It’s amazing how a comment from one person can bring your entire world crashing down.
Tonight after a fantastic performance I was approached by a lady.. Standing with my mother, she said gesturing at my mum “how come you are so thin….” – then looking at me “…and you’re not…”. She looked confused, not sure if mum and I were really related.
Little did she know I’ve struggled with body image since college. Furthermore, it was a comment similar to this which triggered a series of eating disorders in my early 20s.
My heart sank and I was silent on the drive home. Tears streaming down my face mum reassured me I wasn’t fat and I’d come such a long way. My best friend reassured me how strong and amazing my body is and how much it does for me everyday.
I felt their love. But the damage was done. I hadn’t been feeling confident in my body the past few weeks. I thought about purging or going for a long run once I got home.
Instead I took a long hard look at myself in the mirror unclothed. Seeing the marks on my stomach where my jeans had been fastened I broke down crying and climbed into bed.
I then decided today would be the day I start my blog. Something positive will come from this. A safe space to share my thoughts and feelings and hopefully I can help others in some way.
Words can carry so much importance and meaning. They have the ability to make someones day, or in my case today, break someone’s day.
My closing thought is always choose your words wisely.